Signed, Sealed, and Delivered

Happy Holidays! Mine were, because all the tests and due diligence came out acceptable and the negotiations worked out well. The seller even reduced the price a little.

I made airplane reservations to fly out to Colorado for the closing on January 8th. I planned to arrive the day before the closing, drive straight to the house for a final inspection with Agent 007, then back down to my friends’ place in Castle Rock for dinner and the night. The next morning I would drive to Golden for the closing at the title insurance company’s offices. The seller will not be there. I was both disappointed and relieved. Disappointed because I wanted to meet this guy I had been communicating with – mostly through intermediaries. Relieved because it made last minute negotiation and changes impossible. Then I would drive up to my new place…. MINE, I mean OURS!

Somehow the Jersey Girl remained supportive even as the fantasy became reality, she stayed supportive even without ever visiting or seeing the place other than in photos, and having been in the neighborhood a couple of times.  Considering that most of the time she doesn’t believe a word I say or think I know shit about shinola I was amazed that she supported me on this without any push-back. I’ll take what I can get. Sometimes she is just like a 13 year old girl who is certain that her parents are the dumbest people on the planet.

Thursday January 7 rolled around, I flew out with a huge duffel bag of stuff for the house that I brought as checked luggage. Arriving just after noon I picked up the largest rental car I have ever seen: a Toyota Sequoia. I felt like a midget when I drove it. I knew I needed a big vehicle because I would be buying supplies and housewares and picking up a bunch of stuff at the UPS Store PO Box all the things I had gotten on Amazon and the internet.

I knew I would would fill up the massive vehicle with stuff, and I felt good about having 4 wheel drive as it was raining in Denver and then snowing lightly as I drove up into the mountains. I met Agent 007, she wrestled with the lockbox and opened the door. The place was pretty clean, the taxidermy was gone – the only dead animals were flies on the windowsill. I was concerned about being able to lock up the place while it is unoccupied, so I checked all the doors. The kitchen door didn’t lock at all… The doors into the garage didn’t lock, one of them didn’t even close fully and was held sort-of shut with a bungee cord.  All this time we had used the lockbox and front door key when we could have walked to the other side of the house and just waltzed right in the kitchen door. I had even insisted that the seller repair the garage door which was missing a panel and seemed to always be left open. Oh well.

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Satisfied with the condition of the place I headed to my friends’ place south of Denver exhausted and hungry, feeling the effects of the reduced oxygen, feeling the stress of being about to shell out a huge amount of money, trying to hold myself together and hoping I would feel OK after a night’s rest. Being with my friends started to heal me, but they did comment that I “looked like homemade shit.” We went out to dinner, had a few glasses of wine, toasted the future, and went back to their house where we sat in front of the TV and they tried to watch while I rocked the place with my snoring. Too nice to wake me, they waited until I snorted myself awake, excused myself and fell into bed, exhausted. The next morning it was still snowing lightly but I felt a zillion times better. After a shower and breakfast I climbed back into the giant transportation machine. I stopped at Target first thing Friday morning and filled up two shopping carts:

• microwave
• coffeemaker
• toaster
• dishes
• silverware
• toilet paper
• paper towels
• dish soap
• hand soap
• shampoo
• spray cleaner
• sponges
• hand lotion (it is dry up there!)

In the duffel bag I brought stuff from home that we weren’t using:

• drinking glasses
• coffee mugs
• LED lantern
• weather station (left over from another place)
• tools
  • hammer
  • screwdrivers
  • masking tape
  • packing tape

I stopped at a Lowes store and bought:

• folding chairs
• folding table
• more tools
  • utility knife
  • pliers
  • wrench
  • wire cutter
• stepladder
• kitchen trash can
• snow shovel
• broom
• dust pan
• mop
• flashlight & batteries

My credit card was smoking! But the real spending was yet to come.

Then to the closing in Golden, the light snow continued but roads were clear and traffic was no problem. Agent 007 was already there when I arrived, we were sent into a conference room where the title company’s representative came in with a pile of papers and a handful of blue pens. The money had been wired in advance. A couple of dozen signatures and fifteen minutes later we were done.  Agent 007 got an envelope for her work. I was handed a pile of paper and one key and was promised I would hear from the title company with the recorded deed. It was anti-climactic. But the dream came true!  I hoped the dream wouldn’t turn into one of those “careful what you wish for” experiences.

I climbed back into the truck, found a place for a quick lunch and headed up into the mountains. As I climbed out of Denver it was snowing harder and beginning to stick to the roads. By the time I got near the house it looked a lot like winter. Yeah!

I picked up the stuff I sent to the PO Box:

• inflatable bed
• sheets
• comforter
• pillows
• towels
• tools
  • cordless drill, drill bits and screwdriver bits
• alarm system
• lockbox to keep the key available at the house (ha-ha!)
• pots and pans
• webcam (to keep an eye on things and the see weather!)

I stopped at a liquor store for some wine and beer plus a bottle of bubbly to celebrate when the Jersey Girl finally came to the place.  Then the the grocery store for enough food to get me through the weekend, coffee, bagels, fruit, peanut butter and jelly – knowing I would be going out to dinner the few nights I would be there. And finally to a hardware store to make copies of the key – the only key to the whole place which couldn’t be locked anyway! And I also got some ice melt because I remembered how icy it was at the time of the inspection.

Then to the house! Mine! Ours! Home Sweet Home! FINALLY! (even though in reality the entire process was damned quick and painless.) I very carefully backed the truck slightly into the garage, it was a tight fit, but it would be easier to unload without being out in the snow. I ceremoniously opened the front door while taking selfies, documenting the moment.

I got all the stuff inside, turned on the gas fireplace and popped open a beer to celebrate. I unfolded a chair and made myself at home. Then I found the utility knife and started to open boxes and set up camp. I didn’t want to get too comfortable because I knew we would be renovating the place and that filling it up with furniture now would complicate the anticipated renovations. I found the inflatable bed, sheets, comforter, pillows, made the bed and continued to unpack. I was happy and I was tired. That bed next to the gas stove looked mighty comfortable. I would sleep well in my cabin refuge in the mountains.